The Dark Side of Romantic Love: NPD

I am ending the second of a long-term relationship with someone that may have Narcisstic Personality Disorder. It's interesting, as they both were very similar...dark hair, Aquarians from the northeast. They also knew exactly what to say and do to get me to fall for them. The first lasted 8 years, the second, just 2, so I am definitely learning to see the signs ahead of time, and yet, feel disappointed to have re-created this pattern again.

I know that I am not alone, though, there may be many of you reading this right now who are feeling the drain of your positive and light filled-energy with someone who cannot access the center of their heart.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but this Valentine's day you be involved in a battle of the wills instead of blessing of the souls and you may actually be sleeping with a modern-day vampire---otherwise known as a Narcissist. Because Narcissists are such great actors, they will convince you how much they care for you, leaving you lifeless before you see the light of day.

Sam Vaknin, a Narcissist who wrote the book, Malignant Self-Love has called narcissism the mental epidemic of the 21^st century and has said it insidiously infects people who have daily contact with a narcissist. The psychological definition of narcissism is an all-pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy and behavior), with a strong need for admiration or adulation, a lack of empathy, usually beginning early in adulthood. Narcissists are overly obsessed with their image and are driven by their insatiable ego towards a ruthless and never-ending pursuit of gratification, dominance, and ambition. It comes with no surprise that 50-75% are male.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a personality disorder that may be a result of childhood abuse from family, authority figures, or peers. There are two kinds of narcissists: cerebral (intelligence and academic achievements) and somatic (physical or sexual prowess of conquests). When you have NPD, there is no pill you can take to fix it. It is a condition you have to learn to live with and manage. Contrary to popular myth, a narcissist does not love himself, in fact, he often loathes himself and is thus driven to self-denial and bizarre coping mechanisms. A romantic relationship to someone with NDP is a source of life-giving energy that often leads to verbal and emotional abuse.

One tell-tale sign is not being able to get some of your important needs met....they will only give you what they want to give you and nothing more. You can ask until you are blue in the face and they just are unable to comprehend and respond in a kind-hearted manner.

***This is an excerpt of a special report, and you can email me if you would to receive the full report.

Next time I will reveal the stages of seduction that you will probably be drawn into.